This Christmas Jupiter and Saturn will become closer to each other than
they have been for almost 800 years. It is an event that has set the
world astrological community abuzz with the possible consequences of such an
alignment and its potential impact on global leaders and world events.
But what happens when an even rarer conjunction between Pluto and
Uranus occurs and what affect does it hold in store for the lives of
everyday ‘ordinary folk’?
Well, it’s something that Dave from the post room is about to find
out. Pluto is in Uranus and for him this indicates that everything is about
to come up smelling of roses or so he thinks!
Dave suffers from OCF, Obsessive Compulsive Fatalism, and his
Achilles heel is his daily horoscope, which is about to become dramatically
affected by the historic planetary alignment.
The lucky omens predicted will compel him to take uncharacteristic
chances, cross paths with a hotchpotch of larger than life characters who
get him embroiled in situations with hilarious outcomes that are way beyond
his control and out of his comfort zone
Pluto’s In Uranus is written by globally unrecognised no award-winning
Essex author Patrick Haylock.
Discounting his definitive guide to publishing invisible books Pluto’s
in Uranus is Patrick’s debut novel, and it is now available in
Bookstores on Amazon and other online outlets.
Purchase Links
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Plutos-Uranus-Patrick-Haylock-ebook/dp/B08PDNLY3W
https://www.amazon.com/Plutos-Uranus-Patrick-Haylock-ebook/dp/B08PDNLY3W
Trailer
- www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPuhVnCq7e8&feature=youtu.be
Excerpt
Dave’s efforts to recoup his unwon winnings
after placing an ill-fated wager on a horse called Black Kitty, were beginning
to get him involved with characters and into situations way beyond his comfort
zone.
His astrological malfunction had caused him to
cross paths with a theatrical crossdressing bod named JoeJo and a vicar known
as Lord Elpus and he had ended up going to jail with the pair of them. Although
it sounded like a joke Dave didn’t find it at all amusing.
The saving grace was that his time inside was not
down to any misdemeanour, but it had been arranged so as he could meet with Lord
E’s Mellon’s and get some ideas that might help resolve his financial
predicament.
Whilst there Dave meets Top Cat George, who
offers him something called a WIIFU and guarantees that this will solve his
predicament and save the day.
On the journey back Dave begins to realise
that he has been sucked and is now getting dragged even deeper into unfamiliar
territory.
Once home he tries to relax but on launching
his email, the subject header on the top one is going to end up adding to his
woes. It read:
AN URGENT COMMUNICATION FROM THE FEDERAL
BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION.
“Yeah – of course it is,” he said out loud,
laughed and with two clicks of the mouse he consigned it to spam.
Moving further down the list a message from
eBay also caught his eye. On opening it he read: Important message from eBay
seller central.
Reference item: 0001357328641159931 / FREE MONEY
The above item was posted with a buy it now
price of 59 cents.
This item has violated US federal law and the
FBI have issued instruction that all such listings be removed by eBay.
We have therefore supplied The FBI’s internet
fraud unit with your details, and in certain circumstances they may email you.
Should they do so, we must advise of the upmost importance to fully comply with any requests for information or documentation. Please ensure you respond within the specified timescales, as failure to do so could escalate the matter into becoming a more serious offence.
You must cease and desist from further listing
this type of product on eBay otherwise your account may be suspended or
permanently closed. The eBay team – seller central.
In shocked disbelief Dave stood up and,
without removing his gaze from the screen, began twiddling his forelock with
his fingers.
His initial concern was how the hell his item
had ended up on the USA site when he felt sure that he’d only posted it as a UK
listing.
As all trace had now been removed by eBay
there was absolutely no way of finding the answer.
Placing the palms of both hands onto the
desktop he tapped his thumbs and gently swayed back and forth, as he stared
quizzically at the screen.
After a moment, he smacked his forehead with
the palm of one hand, accompanied with the vocal realisation that he’d binned
the poxy forms.
How the hell was he going to contact the
effing FBI? He hastily typed FBI into the search engine and the official site
link appeared. Clicking on the relevant heading took him straight into the
homepage of the Federal Bureau of Investigation.
Dave quickly peered along the top headings and
was bemused to see one called ‘fun and games’! Really, he thought.
After locating the contact button, he found
that it accessed several points of contact, either to a field office, an
overseas office, or the head office – bloody hell, this was getting scary.
No idea, I guess – start at the top, the head
office.
He composed his email explaining the situation
and asked if the forms could be resent.
Ping and it had gone. Jesus, I hope that’s not
an extradition offense, he thought.
An automated reply bounced back.
Thank you for contacting the Federal Bureau of
Investigation, an operative will review your enquiry and respond presently.
His nightmare had just got worse, and to be
honest you would have thought that tangling with the FBI should have been the
worst scenario! However, Dave was yet to discover the perils involved with
taking on Georges WIIFU!
Author Bio –
Social Media Links –
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/20871319.Patrick_Haylock
Follow Patrick’s alter ego on
https://twitter.com/Patthequipper
Pluto's in Uranus - Kushti Bok Big Giveaway. Win a cluster of star
prizes.(Open Internationally)
Prize includes: A kushti Bok Mug, A signed copy of Pluto's in Uranus, A
pack of 50 Lord Elpus Melon's wealth creation cards, A black cat bookmarker,
An engraved pen, and a lucky silver Manx cat coin.
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over. Any personal data given as part of the competition entry is used
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exception of the winners’ information. This will passed to the giveaway
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